I’m back! Well…MAYBE. It’s been about six months since I’ve edited anything on here, and almost a year since I’ve written anything of merit. So what happened?! Well, in all honesty I don’t know…a lot. I’m actually surprised that I’m still able to access this section, and am able to write. So here’s a recap of what’s been going on with me the past year (dear god this is going to be horrible)

I got a testing position with the game Primal Carnage; visited New York and liked it so much I decided to move there; moved to New York with virtually nothing in my name; continued to work with the rest of the QA team on PC as much as I could; went to get my series 63 and 7 licenses; worked in a restaurant for under minimum wage at nights to support myself in NYC; got my licenses;  became involved with an industry completely unrelated to this one; found someone who’s way out of my league who actually cares about me (yeah I couldn’t believe it either) flew back home because of family; started a Youtube gaming channel; now leaving again to another exotic location to take care of one of the family businesses, and finally spending my time traveling all over the globe doing god knows what. Phew, was that a run-on sentence? You bet your ass it was, but that’s how my life’s been. One giant, never ending, methodically insane, transparent run-on sentence that never seems to let me breath in the slightest. I think that’s a good thing, given that if life becomes too slow…well then it just seems wasted. So in short, I think I got a life.

Now, that being said, some of you may think this is me finally turning in my hat, or just admitting to being out of the industry so long, I have no real clue what’s going on. Well…no…none of those things. At least not yet anyways. The reality is, is that I really needed to take a break from this whole thing. Like, seriously just step back and look at the gaming community from a distance. See when you’re in this industry for so many years, and you’re still not seeing an ounce of profitability coming from it, then you really need to step back and just take your time with whatever it is you’re doing. I mean, this is a hobby. I don’t write these words and get a check in the mail or anything for doing so. I just…write what’s on my mind. Given that, sometimes you need to take a break, because nothing’s on your mind. You’re just seeing the same old crap from every company and community week after week. With things coming so slowly it’s worse than watching paint dry. This causes what I call a “Drama Effect” Where the people who do this stuff are so bored, they literally create bullshit just to entertain themselves. Even if that entertainment hurts those around them or themselves. We’re gamers, we live to be entertained. Which is fine in film, video games, books, music….blah blah blah. But the reality is that this is an industry. Reality dictates that the operations behind such works, are much more boring and methodical than the actual product. So story short, shit is freaking mundane as hell.

However, given enough time, exciting things do happen…usually. Like say for instance, the rolling out of new consoles (which I will get into a little bit) Or the introduction of new and exciting games that sound fun. Sometimes I like to have fun….And if I’m not having fun, and I’m not getting paid, then why fuck am I doing it? You just become a press slut to this industry, and you’re valued less than a press whore because you’re not even getting paid to do it. Now some will argue that this is all towards an eventual goal of some sorts. Usually this is the hope of earning cash in this field. However, the likely-hood of that happening is extremely remote, and you might as well hold a cup out on the street…you’ll be more likely to make money that way. Does that sound cynical; yes. But I’m not being cynical in the slightest. I just happen to be a realist, as upsetting as that may be.

OK, so lets just get into some of the thoughts I have about things, before I lull your asses to sleep with my mundane diatribe. Lets start with the consoles, because that’s something exciting and new. So now we know it’s the Wii U, PS4, and Xbox One (which is confusing as hell given this is the third installment)

I wanna start with Xbox, but I’m not gonna bullshit, I really don’t know anything about it. I didn’t watch the conference, even though I got an invite to attend it or something. Apparently there were no games shown, or at least a lack of them. Instead, from what I heard, they focused on informing the audience of the new hardware, and what can be accomplished with it. This seems to upset people, and seemed to during the Sony conference as well. For me…it’s like, “What do you expect people?!” they save things for E3 and the million other conferences this year. I mean, things aren’t the way they used to be. Where it took a while for the main consumer to get news about things. These days we have technology that streams what’s happening in the moment, right as it’s happening. This means they have to dole out things at much slower pace, because we all have access to it as soon as the announcers lips open. I’m actually glad they decided to have separate conferences for the hardware. That means they can spend most of E3 talking about shit we care about, mainly the games. This time it can be like, is the hardware in the hands of developers; yes. Does it work; yes. What will the price be; yes. Now lets talk about video games, and get on with it. Though I don’t like how they basically said the next innovation in gaming, is television.

Lets move on to PS4 shall we? Now this conference I did watch, and because of that I’m going to get a hate comment here or there calling me a fanboy or something. No, I’m not, could care less if I had missed that one too. I just happened to have some free moments at the time. While they did show some games, they mainly focused on the hardware and tech demo’s too. Which, again I liked, because it means they won’t ramble on for an hour about the console at E3 either. I walked away from that conference looking forward to the new machine, and what kind of games may be on it in the near future. Honestly though, from what I saw, all I can really remember was the new Killzone game which looked interesting, and some crap about “moving” your own adventure. I did like the social media aspect, and how they’re really putting a lot of eggs into it. I think they learned from the last round that community is important, and it should be taken seriously. Again, not an expert, but we’re gamers, and when shit is not blowing up in our face, we’re compelled to blow shit up on someone’s Facebook. However I really didn’t like how they said, “We want nothing to get in the way of your game” then for like the rest of the conference went on to say, “Here’s all this tacky stuff that’s gonna get between you and your game.”

OK, so here’s my thoughts on the Wii U. It’s out, it’s fun, and good games are probably on the way. So go out and buy it if you want it. It’s unique and doesn’t make me wanna kill myself like the Wii did, so I think that’s something good. There’s also this really cool horror game I was watching Melyssa play, that seemed really fun. So I’d say look for that, whatever the title is. Think it had zombies in it. So naturally I’m gonna buy one eventually. Maybe when my life slows down, and I actually have time to do that stuff.

Anyways I’m going to abruptly end this editorial, because I got a lot on my mind to rant about, but I think I should space it out. Does this article make sense; no. Does it work; yes. Am I just doing it to clamor attention to me and the site again after being gone for over a year? Hell I don’t know. I honestly think I just wanted to rattle on about things I felt towards this whole industry, and add some substance on what I’ve found interesting this past year. So if I’ve left you thoroughly unsatisfied, I’m sorry. I’ll get back to writing more soon, mainly in the department of editorials, but right now I just had some free time on my hands, and felt like writing this. Cheap I know, but like I said, I’m not getting paid. I’m writing about things I like in general, or stuff I think about. So here’s my two cents on whatever the heck this was about. I hoped you enjoyed this sarcastic adventure with me, and look forward to writing part two.

“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, yearning to breathe free,” quote from the Statue of Liberty. Microsoft took this one to a whole new level. Let’s have some fun and break it down: “Give me your tired… they’ve been working too hard.” Let’s make them lazy by not making them lift the controller. “Give me your poor”, so they can drool over this new technology that they can’t afford. “Your huddled masses”, that will definitely kill each other on release day; “Yearning to breathe free”, so they can have the latest and greatest. Before you get your panties in a bunch about getting excited over the Xbox One, let me shed some light on Xbox One.

First of all, Microsoft, in case you weren’t aware, there’s already an Xbox One. It was the first one. For the love of God, please count. OH NO WAIT, you DO know how! Remember when you were planning on naming the new Xbox the ’720′? Good! So after the console drops, whip out your calculators, and add 360 and 720. What do you get? Redundancy. It could be worse – it could have been the Durango. Way to go Microsoft Marketing team, now please, PLEASE, stop!

So, why are you naming this Xbox One? Oh, you wanted to forget about the first two.  Just promise us that you won’t name the next Xbox, the One also because you wanted to forget about the first three. Look, if I can’t forget about my ex-boyfriends, you can’t forget about the previous Xbox consoles. Life just doesn’t work that way.

Moving on to our favorite part, the fact that we don’t really know what it is. When everyone else’s technology gets sleek and chic, Microsoft decides to be a rebel and go full retro and hipster on us, by giving it the design of a shiny black VCR, or a shoe box. Or a cable box. I looked at it further and then thought, “Oh, they’re actually trying to make it look like an improved original Xbox!” Despising the whole thing anyway, I felt I gave them too much credit.

As I understand it, this will probably cost me my unborn children, in addition to their childrens’ children, and etc. That’s fine and dandy, and I don’t mind selling my soul for it, but not making it backwards compatible? No, I’m really not happy. After I dropped hundreds of dollars on games, controllers, headsets, wireless adapters, hard drives, and whatever else, to not make it backwards compatible is a straight Hadouken to the babymaker. Let me get this straight: I spend $400-500 on the console, plus $60 for another controller, and about $200 to start me off with XBone games. And when my 360 breaks, I then have to spend $200 to buy a new one? Are they OUT OF THEIR BLOODY MINDS?! Microsoft, get over yourself. You might be the 1%, but your consumers are not.

Which brings me to my next point, I’m certainly not going to spend almost $1k on this thing to be taken over by my parents and brothers so it can be left on ALL DAMN DAY due to watching TV and playing videogames, just so it can burn out. Clever devils, aren’t they? You buy the system, it gets burnt out, and then you ship it off and don’t see it again for a month, or your warranty gets voided and you have to buy a new one. We’re all onto your game.

Speaking of games, I really wish Microsoft showed off something we should get excited about. FIFA, Forza Motorsport 5 – those games are still a thing? And before they announced their final game, they brought on Steven Spielberg to talk about a new Halo TV series in the making. I did get excited about that, but that has nothing to do with the Xbox One! They did it so all of us Halo fans can bust one out and get ratings up. However, as quickly as it ascended, it has to quickly descend… by announcing yet another Call of Duty, because we simply can’t get enough of this franchise. However, they added custom characterization where you can alter your face and looks, which comes in handy with a FPS, am I right? I do have to admit that the game looked cool, since they didn’t give us much of anything else to say about it. I know I initially got really excited about having the K9 companion, but then the grey cloud of dread loomed over my head. The dog is going to die, or at least will die in one of the future games. You’re going to have to give it a funeral, and it’s going to be the saddest goddamn thing since the death of your dog Sparky, 5 years ago. As sad and messed up as this is going to sound, PETA is going to be all over this like they were with Pokémon. I can see it now – I’m going to sit back and cry that my puppy died, and then shake my head that PETA is flipping out, and the Westboro Baptist Church is going to protest with “THANK GOD FOR DEAD DOGS” signs. Yes, I can absolutely see this unfolding.

Let’s talk tech now by starting with the positives first. Can we have a slow clap for finally getting Blu-ray? On a serious note, I like the Skype capability, especially as someone who does use it often. I do like the switching ability as well, even though I’m usually only playing videogames or watching TV – not both. What I don’t like? Face recognition. If you happen to get mauled by a chimpanzee (God forbid), you’re pretty screwed, aren’t you? And the fact that the dashboard will show what you were last doing?! That can make for a really awkward situation. I don’t want anyone to remember my history – ever. Now, of course the Kinect is required for the Xbox One, which sucks in itself. I swear, we’re one step away from being like those fat people from Wall-E. I find it easier to go to whatever commands I desire by controller, but I understand it takes effort, and effort is not exactly supported anymore. Welcome to the new age!

So, I think I covered the essentials. Unless Microsoft presents us with something revolutionary, I have nothing to say that’s really all that positive. I don’t want a relationship with my Xbox, I don’t want it to be a family system. And I certainly don’t want it to be a “water cooler” (what the hell was that even about?! Consoles are NOT used for that purpose). Bottom line, buyers and Xbox enthusiasts just got royally XBoned.

First appeared on www.NerdyButFlirty.com

Twenty minutes into Star Trek: Into Darkness, and I knew I wanted to watch this movie again.

I almost hesitated to write this review, wondering if I was extremely biased by my love of Star Trek. This couldn’t possibly be one of the best movies I’ve ever seen; I must just be mistaken. And yet…this movie melted off my little nerdy face.

Could this be one of the best sci-fi movies of our time? Quite possibly. If you love the Star Trek franchise, go see this movie. It’s even better than the reboot. IT’S A SEQUEL THAT’S BETTER THAN THE FIRST. But that’s oddly appropriate, given the history of Star Trek movies.

Plot

When the crew of the Enterprise returns from a “routine” mission, they find that all is not well at Starfleet, as they are under attack by someone within their own ranks. Kirk sets off on a manhunt into a war-zone to capture the bad guy…and then everything goes to hell in a handbasket.

The story was interesting and shocking in some ways, yet predictable and campy in others. I didn’t mind the camp of the main villain too much, because, after all, this is a movie based on an old franchise. As someone very prone to nostalgia, having villains who are a throwback to a bygone age in movies isn’t as big of a deal to me, although I know it will bother some people.

Another big issue with the plot is that it is clearly split into different acts, as opposed to feeling like one cohesive whole. On the other hand, this added to my feeling of having made a journey with the crew, of having been through a lot together. In that way, the movie is set up very much like a game, with quests needing to be completed before moving on to other quests. If that sounds boring or tedious to you, then you might not like this movie. For someone like me, who really enjoys the adventure, it was noted, but didn’t take me out of the film.

Rounding out the negatives are the odd moments of character highlights that seem important but are then never seen or heard from again, and the little movie logic decisions (movie sins, I believe the kids call them) that bug nitpickers about every movie.

But all-in-all, I found this plot compelling, exciting, intriguing, and wonderfully nostalgic. This movie was made for Star Trek fans, through and through.

Cast

The highlight of the movie for me is, of course, the greatest bromance of all time: Spock and Kirk. The interactions between them and the other cast members was just brilliant, especially the relationship between Uhura and Spock, the roles of everyone on the ship, and the wonderful Urban’s spot-on interpretation of Bones.

The only actor I did not really enjoy played the main villain, Benedict Cumberbatch. I found his lines over-delivered and far too Shakesperean compared to the rest of the movie. Sometimes the camera would zoom in on his face and I would laugh, it was that bad.

Chris Pine as Kirk

Zachary Quinto as Spock

Zoe Saldana as Uhura

Karl Urban as Bones

Simon Pegg as Scotty

John Cho as Sulu

Benedict Cumberbatch as John Harrison

Special Effects

The art direction and special effects were gorgeous, fluid, and epic. Everything was beautiful, and even the 3D was used in a way that made sense. No complaints here!

Music and Audio

Perfectly complimenting the visuals was the sound. Booming and precise, with hints of nostalgia. I enjoyed both the music and the sound direction.

Final Thoughts

Overall, the actors were great and the chemistry between characters was spot on. I loved all the little callbacks to the original series and movies, including little facial expressions, actual quotes, and even tableaus. Star Trek: Into Darkness perfectly captured the excitement I felt when watching the original series, and I can’t wait to watch this crew’s next adventure. I’ve been seeing that some mainstream news sources are saying the movie is disappointing… I’m wondering if they were too busy looking for flaws instead of enjoying the adventure.

First appeared on www.NerdyButFlirty.com

Star Wars: Legacy is the second iteration by that name. The first dealt with Cade Skywalker, the bounty hunter. This new series deals with Ania Solo, a descendent of Han and Leia.

A female Han Solo? Yes please.

The art in this issue is great and feels very reminiscent of Star Wars in general. However, this definitely feels like a “middle” issue, with not a lot going on. #3 is clearly meant to set up circumstances for the next issue, rather than sharing any surprises or intriguing battles.

However, don’t let this stop you from giving the series a try! You can buy the digital copies here.

Plot

Ania Solo and her friends have been chased, blockaded, and shot at, and now they’re stuck on a world of molten sulfur, all because an Imperial Knight wants them dead. Just when things seem bleakest, another Imperial Knight shows up! Is he here to help them, or help destroy them?

Writer:

Corinna Bechko, Gabriel Hardman

Artist:

Gabriel Hardman

Colorist:

Rachelle Rosenberg

Cover Artist:

Dave Wilkins

It’s finally here, after months of wait and speculation, Microsoft has announced it next Xbox system and it’s name is… (What for Drum Roll) Xbox One. Yes Xbox One, the One signifying what Microsoft is aggressively going after in making this an all in one system for the living room. The show started off with a video saying how the brought games to life and how they brought games to us, so right off the back I thought Microsoft was going the Sony route by saying how important gaming was to the system. But then the video keeps going, and begins to discuss the relationship between you in the TV this platform will bring. And THAT is really what this conference was all about.

Microsoft didn’t waste any time and showed off what everyone came to see, the system. Yes the actual physical system was on display for the world to see, something Sony failed to do with the Playstation 4. I personally like the design, it’s sleek and shinny, simple yet elegant, and the redesigned controller looks better, if not really similar, than the previous. Then Microsoft dived in and showed off what they were bringing to the table. Of course the Kinect is still here and looks to be more powerful and responsive, as using a simple voice command, “Xbox on,” the system pops on. The home screen looks a lot like Windows 8, I don’t think anyone is really surprised with, and was sporting a new feature called “Trending.” With this you can see what you friends are liking and what people around Xbox Live are liking. With a simple command, “Xbox watch TV,” you arte now watching TV on your Xbox and with the new “Instant switching” mode you can switch on the fly between TV, gaming, music, and other apps on the Xbox and “Snap” mode allows users to use multiple aps at once like a fully supported Skype in HD and with video chat. Another cool feature was using Minority Report like motions to surf channels and browse around the Xbox. Now while this all looked cool, I can’t help but wonder how effective it will work once the consumer gets in in their living room.

Not done with pushing TV, Microsoft shows off watching ESPN and getting instant updates to you fantasy league on screen. Using voice control allows the user to surf through the TV guide, change channels, and let’s you know what TV shows are trending. You can be sitting on the couch and say, “What’s on HBO?” or “Watch the Price is Right.” And this all looks cool, but I worry about the recognition of the voice control. If I don’t say the name of the show the same way my family does, will it work for all of us? What if I have an accent, will that factor in?

We got a little info on the specs of the system. It will have: 8 Core CPU, 8 GB system memory, 500 GB HDD, Blu-ray drive, 802.11n wireless with Wi-Fi direct, HDMI in/out, and USB 3.0. The Kinect comes with all Xboxs and is required for use. With its redesigned controller, Kinect, and smart glass technology, Microsoft is boasting that there will be no lag between input and system. That still remains to be seen but if true, all the power to Microsoft. The new Xbox Live will be run by over 300 thousand servers and everything stored in the cloud to access you data anywhere.  New Achievements will by more dynamic and show off more of what you have done and there will be a sharing option with the ability to record and upload videos (though not much was spoken on that).

At this point we are about 35 minutes in and nothing has been mentioned about actual gaming on the system. EA came out and announced a partnership with Mircosoft. They announced 4 games coming to the Xbox One; Fifa 14, Madden 25, NBA Live, and UFC. All games are not exclusive but EA states that the Xbox version will have exclusive content. Also announced exclusive to Xbox One is EA Sorts Ignite. It’s a game engine that is supposed to make the sport games more realistic, which is what they try to do with every iteration of any EA sports game. So far it’s only confirmed for Xbox One but it sounds like this is how they will make their sports game from now on across platforms. EA ended their segment with “… how all EA Sports games will look and play on Xbox One.” (Sigh) This miffed me, the first footage of any game for the new system and it isn’t game play footage, but the usual trailer footage EA makes for their Sports game. This isn’t how the game will look or feel once it hits the system and that’s what I really wanted to see. It’s a personal gripe yes but still.

More talk about how Microsoft is making gaming more immersive, personal and connected. All right, this is what I was waiting for, some talk about the games… Sadly no. They announced Forza Morta Sport 5, a racing game that will be available at launch, great, except again we are treated to another CGI trailer. Now this trailer is a little harder to tell if it’s actual game footage, made with in game graphics, or a CGI trailer but I believe it is the latter. If the game actually looks this good I will be astonished and happy that they could pull that off. Next was the announcement by Remedy Studios, developers of Alan Wake, with Quantum Break that is a brand new IP. I live action trailer with some not so great acting leads into gameplay footage of a boat crashing and some stills in a gun battle. Nothing really shown about the game at all which looks like a theme here.

Back to television, Microsoft announced they are working on several studios and their first show is going to be a live action Halo show, produced by Steven Spielberg. This sounds like a cool idea considering how popular their Halo franchise is and how long they’ve been trying to make a live action movie. Not much is known about the project yet. They also announced a partnership with the NFL, really going after the sports fans with this one. Microsoft is definitely going after a completely different market and they are firing on all cylinders.  Lastly, what’s Xbox without Call of Duty. The new title, Call of Duty: Ghost was announced and we were given a pick and the development of the title and the improvements of the graphics compared to MW3. New to Call of Duty is a dog as your part of your squad and “new” features like vaulting and leaning to shot around corners. This might by new to the franchise but not FPS. And we are given the first trailer for the game which actually shows off some of the game. And it looks good, CoD fans can be excited again. And with that the event ends.

So how did Microsoft do? Well I have to start by saying that I was personally underwhelmed. I didn’t see much of anything about actual games and I am a gamer first and foremost. While some people are stating that this wasn’t targeted at us gamers, I ask who is not a gamer watching this at 10 in the morning pacific time? That being said, I can put that side of my aside and say I am very interested in what Xbox One is trying to accomplish. The interactive entertainment HUB is pretty awesome and responsive from what they have shown. They clearly want to grab a larger audience than just the core gamer. Even though they have to go against products already out there that do the same thing, they are bringing some interesting ideas to the table. I just don’t know how far they can go if they alienate the hardcore gamer audience. While they could probably bring in more customers than they would lose, I don’t expect the starting price point to be cheap so why would non gamers want to shell out the money when they already have smart TVs? Microsoft did announce 15 exclusive titles coming to the Xbox One in the first year with 8 of those being new IPs. That is an impressive number for a launch and I expect them to really go after the core gamers at E3 in a few weeks.  All in all I was disappointed and I thought Sony did a better job revealing the PS4, but again, I’m a gamer and that’s who Sony was speaking to. E3 is going to be big this year so expect a lot more details to come rolling in soon.

Some announcements made after the show; some companies were able to announce games coming to Xbox One such as Assassin’s Creed 4 and Watch Dogs. The Xbox does not have to be always connected, however it seems that they are pushing for being as connected as you possibly can. In an interview from Kotaku with Phil Harrison, he stated that you have to connect to the Internet at least once a day. Another interesting piece of information, again from Kotaku, is that the Xbox One will not block used games. However you will need to pay a fee to play a used or borrowed game that, at least in the case of a new game, would be the same price as purchasing the game itself. Microsoft says they are still working on a way to trade and sell game codes online so I will wait for a little more information on that before condemning them for basically saying if your friend wants to barrow your game he might as well buy a copy himself.

Well there you have it folks, A lot of info to take in one day but we finally know what Microsoft is planning. Who do you think had the better reveal, Xbox or Playstation? Which are you most looking forward to? Either way, this years E3 is going to be huge.

With the huge success of Batman: Arkham Asylum and Batman: Arkham City, there was no doubt that there would be another iteration in the series. Many wondered where you go from Arkham City; Arkham County? Arkham Tri-state area? We got an tease from the Joker himself when during the 2011 Spike VIdeo Game awards pulled out a file labeled Arkham World and called it a spoiler. Imagine our surprise when it was announced the the next game would be a prequel. Batman: Arkham Origins, developed by  Warner Bros. Games Montreal instead of the previous developer Rocksteady Studios, is set to take place several years before the first game Arkham Asylum with a younger, less experienced Batman taking on eight deadly assassin’s hired by Black Mask. It’s Christmas Eve and with the bounty on Batman’s head, everyone will be gunning for him. The trailer features Batman, Deathstroke, Black Mask, and Deadshot, not to mention three very unlucky criminals.

Batman: Arkham Origins is set to put a higher emphasis on detective work than previous games. Also offering a plethora of side missions including a “Crime in Progress” where Batman can stop street crimes or aid the police to improve his reputation and a “Most WAnted” mode where you go after other villains in Batman’s rogue gallery. Batman: Arkham Origins is set to release October 25, 2013 and if you preorder you get to play as the assassin Deathstroke. Check back with us for more updates on your favorite caped crusader.

“Come at me, bro.”

Some of the content in Iron Man 3 may disappoint a few nasally-voiced nerds and fanatic purists, but for the non-comic book types who just like superhero movies, and the majority of the crowds herding along or riding their bandwagons to theaters this week, it should do just fine. It’s a much needed improvement after the second installment, and it makes a better companion to the first film, yet it doesn’t quite reach the thoroughly satisfying level that The Avengers provided (a comparison I make only because it seems to aim for a similar blend of magnitude, comedic levity, and character intimacy).

Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is now suffering from PTSD and anxiety attacks (of the shoddy Hollywood variety) after he nearly sacrificed his life for humanity at the end of The Avengers. Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow), Colonel James Rhodes (Don Cheadle), and Happy Hogan (ex-franchise director/skinnier actor, Jon Favreau) return as Stark’s partners in anticrime. Stark has been ignoring them as he slips further into isolation and obsession with tech tinkering in his workshop. A trio of new characters come in the form of Maya Hansen (played by the underutilized Rebecca Hall), Aldrich Killian (Guy Pearce), and The Mandarin (Ben Kingsley).

The film’s plot is introduced through some interesting ideas that never really play out. Killian comes to Stark Industries to propose a project, and it turns out he and Pepper are longtime acquaintances. He has gone from über-geek-loser to dashing millionaire scientist since she last saw him, and he resumes putting some moves on her. We think there might be some romantic drama derived from Killian’s strong interest in Pepper, as opposed to the relationship problems she’s having with Stark, but that potential plot thread fizzles out about 15 minutes into the movie.

Killian’s proposed project is also an intriguing idea at first. He explains that there is an unused portion of the human brain that can be targeted by his company’s formula, Extremis, to push humans closer to their biological potential. This notion turns out to be a plot device when Extremis falls into malicious hands and populates the film with mostly disposable bad guys who are fast, strong, get really hot and glow when they are angry, and stomp around wreaking havoc for no clear rhyme or reason. Aside from Extremis’ initial introduction, the movie has no interest in explaining the pseudo-science behind the drug. Some users seem addicted while others don’t, some can handle its effects while others explode, and some seem fully autonomous while others are basically murderous zombies.

The main missteps of Iron Man 3 are in its inconsistent narrative pacing and tone. As with most big-budget summer movies as of late, it runs over two hours and has its peaks and valleys. There are not any truly boring moments, but I found myself briefly zoning out a bit around the three-quarters mark. The action scenes are heavily computerized and overblown, but aside from the climax, they never really pour over into sensory overload.

The best action feat is the Air Force One crash sequence we got a glimpse of during the Super Bowl earlier this year. Not only is it the most visually exciting and superhero-y moment in terms of audience engagement, but it also counteracts the film’s tonal flaws. Shane Black directed and co-wrote the film, and he seems to be intent on seizing opportunities to subvert the superhero movie genre. There are numerous occasions where a scene sets itself up for something nerdgasmic and badass to happen, and breaks the expectation at the last minute by diverting to slapsticky humor.

There are two crucial situations in the last act in which Tony calls for his newly developed set of nanobot-respondent armor. In the first, one glove and one boot make it there before the rest of the suit, and he’s left ungracefully hovering around the room and fighting his attackers off. In the second, he’s poised and ready to have all the pieces assemble themselves on his body so he can triumphantly take out the main villain, and the suit collides with a pillar next to him, falling to the ground anticlimactically. The most obvious example of the film’s defiance of convention comes from a plot twist surrounding Kingsley’s Mandarin. Let’s just say he’s not exactly the archenemy, bin Laden-esque, America-hating, philosophizing super terrorist he makes himself out to be in the beginning.

It’s a conflicting thing to see this betrayal of audience presumptions. On the one hand, we’re always criticizing movies for being cliché and predictable, but at the same time it feels strangely off-putting when we are geared up by expectations for a familiar valiant pose, one-liner, or payoff, and they are deflated by a visual or narrative punch line. Some of these instances were clever and refreshing, but not all of them sat right with me. They were eliciting laughs from the audience, but I was almost wishing Black had just gone with convention and played more of them with the typical aggrandizing movie flair that makes the testosterone-loaded frat boys in the back row of the movie theater hoot and holler in approval.

“Tony, your eyes look so beautiful and blue in this light….”

Most of this humility is funneled into the main thematic stream of humanizing Tony Stark. There is a constant question about whether the man makes the suit or the suit makes the man. The trials and tribulations employed to develop Tony are actually pretty akin to those of a classic Joseph Campbell hero’s journey. We get to see him out of his comfort zone and away from his abundant money and resources for a long stretch in the middle of the movie. During this segment, there are a few MacGyver-like sequences that showcase the same brainy ingenuity that led Stark to escape his captors and become Iron Man in the first film.

All-in-all, this installment did not leave me with any strong positive or negative reaction. It’s more satisfactory than satisfying, but not completely forgettable like Iron Man 2. It takes a kind of ho-hum position in the Marvel adaptation lexicon, but that’s probably a fate that would have befallen any movie that followed-up The Avengers. It won’t leave a bad taste in your mouth, but don’t expect to be singing its praises either.

Red, Blue, Yellow, Gold, Silver, Crystal, Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald, Diamond, Pearl, Platinum, Black, White.

Whenever a conversation is brought up about Game Freak, these colors are used in sentences to specifically talk about the games that they’ve worked on, those games being Pokemon specifically.

And that’s about it, at least from what most people know, as they are a group specifically known for Pokemon, and nothing more.

I mean, who remembers Pulseman for the Sega‘s Mega Drive? Or 2005’s Drill Dozer for the GBA? (admittedly, these games were released in dying consoles in their respective times, so it‘s fair to say those wouldn‘t be remembered much).

But after some welcome changes in Game Freak’s internal structuring, employees were allowed to create new titles (while still working on Pokemon, mind you, that’s never going to change). And just like that, development began on this new game (surprisingly, this game was the brainchild of James Turner, who was the guy who created both Golurk, who is now loved by fans, and well… Vanille… But that’s besides the point).

That game, is called HarmoKnight.

Unlike anything previously created by the team, this title is a different breed altogether, not an RPG, not an action/adventure title, but instead; a rhythm/sort of platformer..

The story (yes, it has a story) put you in the control of Harmo, who after a meteor crashes on the planet, bringing along an evil entity known as Gargan that corrupts the planet, is send to deliver a note-shaped staff that has the ability to defeat this evil being to Symphony City, where someone who has the potential to become a HarmoKnight should be.

In all honesty thought, the story is forgettable, as are the characters, I applaud the effort to bring some sort of story telling, but it just falls flat and it just feels tacked on, then again, no one buys a rhythm game for the story.

The gameplay is where is at. You control Tempo, using only the A and B buttons, gameplay sometimes gets switched around every few stages to keep the game fresh, you are in control of a mine cart, other times you control an archer and fire away at far off enemies, and other times you use a drummer and a monkey… Yeah, don’t take this game seriously.

There are also boss stages sprinkled throughout the campaign, these stages are actually on the easy side, thanks to the fact that the game gives you the timing for each, another complain from these stages, is that you must always hit the last note, if you don’t, that means an automatic fail, which brought a frustrated grunt out of me more than once, since I had done it perfectly until then, fortunately, the stages aren’t overly long, so it’s not that much of a problem, although a skip for the first part of the track (EBA style) would have been nice.

(Don’t mind the German translation here)

The goal of each stage is to collect the most notes possible, this can be done by grabbing the notes floating around, hitting an enemy with the staff, as well as the instruments around the level, if enough are grabbed, a Royal Note that is needed to advance is received, this sounds easy enough, but this game is unforgiving in its rhythm and timing, if the hits are off by even a little bit, you will miss and will be damaged, or the target will bounce off completely missing the note, unlike past Nintendo rhythm games, this one can be a bit tough to master, even after I finished it, I still had trouble going through it.

How does the game look? It looks great! The graphics sport a cartoonish style that fit the lighthearted atmosphere of the game, even the enemies look silly for the most part, the models are well done and visible enough when they appear on-screen, allowing you enough time to react in order to hit them in the face while following the rhythm.

In the sound area? Well…  The sound cues are great, but the music itself is not the most catchy music ever created, I would go as far as to say it’s forgettable, I honestly cannot remember any of the tracks outside the Pokemon bonus tracks (which are a welcome addition to the game) and the Final Stage, which is only possible due to my repeated failure.

Another thing I noticed that other reviewers didn‘t address, was that the music in certain stages was recycled through each level, only being very minimally different, and the stages themselves being slightly altered, which is a lazy thing from the music department to do, seeing how the music was already forgettable enough, this is okay in games where platforming is key, but not in rhythm games, where music must definitely be good.

The game itself is also rather short, but for an eShop title, the length is to be expected, although the price tag of 15 bucks will surely put off some people.

But still, even with all of my complaints, I still can’t let this game go, using two buttons is simple enough, but mastering it has been a blast, I still think this franchise can do better, a sequel that deals with all of the issues this game has would be welcome, Game Freak, so when you are not working on Pokemon X and Y, that would be appreciated.

In conclusion, this is a game that I would only recommend to rhythm game fans, and for that matter, MAYBE Pokemon fans for the bonus tracks alone, although I don’t expect those guys to shell out 15 dollars for this game, it’s still a pretty solid entry that it wouldn’t hurt to have on your 3DS, but you really wouldn’t miss anything by waiting for the game to go on sale.

The yearly anime convention called Chibi-Pa will be hosting a free event tomorrow at Ichimura Japanese Garden, located in Miami.

I will be hosting panels and possibly giving free stuff. Get there early, the panels have no solid schedules and will be randomly scheduled at the event. The panels hosted will be

• Spot the Fakes: How to Avoid Ripoffs and Other Unlicensed Goods
  
• Otaku on a Budget

So if you live in South Florida, drop by.

Poker Night at the Inventory 2 is TellTale’s latest Xbox Live Arcade, Steam and Playstation Network game and is, as the title suggests, a Poker game at it’s core. More than that, this downloadable title is an example of how great personalities and some clever writing can make a functional but not particularly exciting card game into an engaging and fun experience for the player.

After a short and cameo filled introduction the player, aptly named and referenced to as “Player”, is introduced to their adversaries for the night’s game; Brock from “The Venture Bros.”, Claptrap from “Borderlands”, Ash from “Army of Darkness” and Sam of “Sam and Max”. Other characters from these titles and other telltale titles drift in and out during the course of tournaments.

The Cast of Poker Night at the Inventory 2

The writing in this game is superb, drawing from popular culture, developer-in jokes and character backstories, always keeping the player engaged and chuckling throughout. TellTale has made the focus of the game the characters and their interactions whilst playing, not the poker itself. This works well in this game as the mix of nostalgia and humour, brought to life by the characters and Glad0s, allow the player get wrapped up in the experience not the base gameplay, often hanging out for the cast’s quips and comments more than counting the chips on the table and watching for tells.

The poker in game feels a little drab itself, and without the writing would probably be just another basic poker game. The choice of Glad0s as dealer helps to liven up the gameplay as she regularly drops from the ceiling to provide ‘helpful’ comments to the player. The game also features character animations to give away when they are bluffing, but they are not common or very well executed. The Player may also buy drinks for the cast from the bartender Mad Moxxi of the  Borderlands games. They make the ‘tells’ from others more obvious, but they still didn’t play much of a role in the results of the tournaments. When you get to playing you get a choice between “Texas Hold ‘Em” and “Omaha”, both games play well and the tournaments serve as opportunities for bragging rights, and more importantly, unlocks. After completing challenges you are offered the chance to win a special item from each character’s title, such as Ash’s Necronomicon and Claptrap’s Video Game Award, each awarding the player with unlocks outside of the game.

Borderlands 2 Unlocks

The game’s brilliant writing is added to by the ability to get heads and skins for Borderlands 2 on all platforms, and then platform specific unlocks including avatar items, Team Fortress 2 hats and exclusive themes. These unlocks keep the game playable well after the dialogue starts to repeat, but once you complete these there is little to keep you playing after the occasional game for nostalgia’s sake. There are also felt, deck and chip variants for each title to unlock, purchasable with ‘unlock tokens’ won in tournaments. These re-skin the bar and game aspects, but don’t affect gameplay.

Overall this game is quite fun and well worth the price tag, quite cheap on all platforms. The jokes, dialogue and unlocks make the game quite addictive and entertaining, but the replay value drops once the dialogue starts to loop and the unlocks are all collected. Some extra modes, multiplayer and more dialogue would help with the replay value, but the game is still great. For some laughs, free items and a good bit of poker fun this is well worth the download. A solid 8/10!