Hey kids! It’s October again! You know what this means?
Time for another round of degrading, horrifyingly terrible Halloween costumes. In other words the stuff the nightmares of cosplayers everywhere. These costumes are so terrible, their aim doesn’t even have to be to scare you to strike terror into your heart and leave you in a corner of your room in the fetal position. Whether it’s a blatant ripoff of one of your beloved characters, another repulsive “sexy” costume, or a failed attempt at originality, these costumes are all around us. This is just a personal account of what costumes I’ve found lying around the Internet, waiting for October to come out of the shadows and haunt the living.
Zombie Unicorn
Have you ever wondered what an attempt at taking the overrated unicorn and unifying it with the zombie genre would look like? Definitely not awesome. Scary. But not in the way that was aimed for.
This entire costume aims to punch MLP fans in the stomach by making a rainbow colored outfit, high heels, fishnet leggings, and a unicorn headband enough to classify as a unicorn. Also, it is a sad reminder to people who like zombies that apparently, anything with blood on it can become a zombie. If in the future there are costumes like “Zombie Armchair” you can blame it on monstrosities like this.
What makes me madder though is this.
It’s the exact same outfit! The only difference is there’s no blood and the makeup’s a bit different, which makes me imagine this happened after they shot this photo for the costume catalogue.
Director: Drats! We ran out of costume ideas and we only need one more.
Intern: I know! Let’s take this costume and…. put blood on it and stuff and it’ll be a zombie unicorn!
Director: Not bad, what with all these kids into zombies and horses nowadays it’ll be perfect! Fetch some of the leftover blood bottles from the other zombie shoots!
Just, no one should go to a zombie walk in that outfit…… or anywhere.
Fruit “Costumes”
The one thing that extremely bothers me about Halloween is the entire dress + quirky add ons = costume mumbo jumbo. This just takes something boring and manages to create another “sexy” costume. Like the next time a guy looks at the phallus shaped banana they’ll think of a hot chick.
This becomes sadder once you realize those outfits cost more than $50 each.
Job Costumes (including sexy ones I’d rather not put up)
Yes, I feel a need to address the work attire costume industry head on. Because:
- Some of those jobs are everywhere to be seen. They probably feel insulted people are wearing their “uniform” as a costume.
- Some of them don’t even dress like that (sexy teachers for example).
- They’re not original or interesting in any way. They just aren’t.
Digital Diva
Now I saved this one for last because it’s one of those ripoffs so insulting, you have to take a step back and reflect on your life a little bit. Alas I present to you “Digital Diva.”
Mmmmmh, that sure doesn’t resemble anything I’m familiar with.
Actually you know what, yes, it completely does. And it’s a complete insult.
I know countless cosplayers who spend loads of money or a lot of time and effort to get an exact copy of the real outfit Hatsune Miku wears, and not only that one, but variations, alternates, video game, and live performance replicas. So dwindling all this down to a mini skirt, blouse, ties, leggings, boots, and arm warmers which is nothing like what her original outfit is, is a slap to the face.
I encourage costume companies to stop making horrible ripoffs like these and give credit to the original source of inspiration by making licensed costumes, before more people suffer because of these eyesores.