Disclaimer: This article is satire and is not to be taken seriously.
Akron, OH: An Ohio man has finished The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild entirely while on the toilet. Robert Zuckus bought a Nintendo Switch purposefully for sitting on the toilet, awaiting his bowel movements. He had diligently worked on the new Zelda game while also working on his number two’s.
“I bought the Nintendo Switch specifically for its portability,” Zuckus said. “I like to play it while taking a dump. It’s better than reading the newspaper or flipping through my phone. When I leave the restroom, I feel accomplished, both with the game and what I left in the pot.”
When asked how many times in the bathroom it took to complete Breath of the Wild, Zuckus said that he wasn’t quite sure, but he typically likes to spend at least an hour on the toilet a day.
“It adds up after a while, I guess,” Zuckus continued. “I wasn’t expecting to finish the whole game only in the bathroom, but once I committed to it, I just went with it.”